


Chronicles of a better (wo)man - Thirteenth Doctor

by SHADOWSQUILL



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-29 18:03:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19405399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SHADOWSQUILL/pseuds/SHADOWSQUILL
Summary: "We never forget our first Doctor." The TARDIS never forgot any of them and is still ready to go back on adventures with his many incarnations. [This is a reedition of "Brèves de TARDIS". I'm gathering all the one-shots by Doctor for it to be easier.]





	1. I'm forbidden

Their last adventure had been hard on them and the Doctor chose not to go back on another for now. All of them had been badly hit by the biggest threat the Doctor had seen in all her lives. She had thought that nothing could be worse than Daleks, worse than the war on Gallifrey. Nothing worse than the filthy smell of terror and death. She wasn’t easily scared but on that one, she was terrified. Maybe more than any of her friends that had had to cheer her up despite their own positions. She should have been the one helping them but it had been the contrary. It was always the contrary. She couldn’t even foul herself anymore. The Doctor without companions was nothing but a title. The Doctor without her companions would have disappeared a long time ago. It was unbelievable that it took her so long to understand this.

There were companions and companions, good friends and more than friends. Her hearts were always stinging a bit when her thoughts were going back to Rose Tyler. She had fallen so quick and hard for this blonde woman. Time wasn’t healing completely the scar her absence was causing to her whole being. She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt what she was feeling for Rose. If she had ever felt this way before. Unfortunately, this love story had ended as tragically and fast as it had happened. Humans were fragile and they withered in a blink of an eye. She knew she shouldn’t get so attached to them but she was making the mistake every time, and her enemies were using it against her every single time. But she never made the mistakes of falling in love ever again. That’s what she had promised herself. Until it happened again.

The first time they met was in a train for Sheffield where she happened to have fallen after her latest regeneration. _“Fat lot of use you two were”_ were the first words she ever said to her. Yasmin Khan. Proud clever woman, too conditioned to think like a human but open-minded. Strong and bold, she hadn’t hesitated in running after Tim Shaw in that dark alley. Every adventure that had followed showed how well she was fitting to her extra-terrestrial world, that they were both looking for breath-taking life experiences that made you forget about the ordinary and boring stuff. The history of her family was complex, sad and beautiful and they were all a part of it. This one adventure made her realise how close they had grown and how well her team – gang? fam? – was working together. Plus, Yaz had been the first one to step back in the TARDIS and ask for more.

There had been more. More of everything: adventures, laughs, fear, running, friendship, family. And love. As unexpected as it had been for the Doctor to realise that. She wasn’t quite happy with his truth. She remembered all too well how it had ended last time her hearts had fallen for someone, for a human being. She couldn’t allow herself to feel like this again, couldn’t go through that pain again. She needed to pull up her shields and ignore the call of her emotions. It wasn’t good for any of them, for her the most. After all, Yaz would grow old and die and she would be there still. Love really wasn’t something she could let herself dive in. It would cause more harm than anything and the Doctor just wanted to have fun. Travelling and having fun, that was her motto. All the rest was unexpected and played a huge part in the fun.

That adventure though hadn’t been fun. It wasn’t meant to either. It had been a necessary stop for the ship. She had needed a spare part to build that thing she was working on. She couldn’t remember what it was anymore. The pieces were laying in a corner of her work place, abandoned among many other projects. It didn’t matter anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing but the fact she had brought them all back to Earth, to safety. They weren’t blaming her for anything. She had gone through the same hell as them, if not worse. She was in many ways stronger than them but she also had her weaknesses and the man who had them all in his power played on those weaknesses. She had managed to run away from the tyrant and to save her companions but many had died in those filthy basements where they were detained.

She trembled at that thought. It still shook her to the core to think about the victims of that man. It was bringing back bad memories to her, memories of other victims. She pushed the thought aside and put her hand on the lever. The TARDIS hadn’t moved from Earth in days. Or weeks. She had lost herself in her thoughts. She had tried, many times, to pull down that lever, to launch the dematerialization sequence and leave for another planet but she could never go to the end of it. She was too terrified and that was keeping her on Earth, the only place close to home she had. Of course, she was keeping that fear to herself. She was attempting to conquer it on her own. Her companions had come a couple times and she had pretended that the TARDIs needed a complete refuelling since their last adventures had tired her too much.

“Doc?”

The Doctor raised her head from the ship’s console. She had been so absorbed in her regrets and memories that she hadn’t heard the door being opened. Graham walked up to her, a worried frown on his face. Finding her standing there with her hand on a lever and an indecisive look on her face increased his worry for her.

“Trying to get away from us?”

He was trying to joke but only got a tiny smile. How long since she last had a full night of sleep? She wasn’t acting like usual. She wasn’t even wearing her beloved coat and her clothes were creased. Her hand fell back on her side and she shrugged.

“Was trying to get something done.”

“The universe can do it without you for now. Fancy a drink?”

“The universe always needs me. It’s my punishment.”

“Punishment for what?”

“They died and I live.”

She turned her back on him and pretended to be doing something so he wouldn’t suspect anything. But it was too late to pretend that she was alright. He had taken her by surprise and she hadn’t had the time to pull on her brave face. Her true feelings were exposed. Graham put a hand on her shoulder. She made a face but didn’t shrug it off for once.

“Doc, we’ve all noticed that there was something wrong since we came back from that evil merchant’s planet.”

“I don’t wanna talk about that.”

“We have to, Doc. You can’t go on thinking like this in your corner.”

“Thinking like what? The TARDIS is recovering and I’m making a list of all the places we will go next. Everything’s fine.”

“That’s why you can’t pull down that lever and fly away, because you’re _fine_?”

Her body tensed and she shrugged his hand off her shoulder. He had seen the truth behind her lies and she kept messing around to avoid any explanation. She should know better. She had been travelling with Graham for a while: he was rather pessimistic, always hungry, but he also was stubborn and clever. Qualities she usually liked, but not when they were used against her.

“When Grace died, my whole world fell apart. I was blaming you and the blue alien thingy for it. She has always been so brave and so devoted to others. In the end, she died for the person she loved the most: her grandson, Ryan. She trusted you. She died believing we were in good hands. I had a hard time believing it myself after all we’ve gone through but I do believe it now. You’ve done your best to keep us all safe and look at us now: we’re all alive, safe and sound, ready for the next adventure. You’ve picked three different humans and made them a family. A family you’re part of. We wouldn’t be there without you, Doc, and we’re all thankful to have you. Don’t give up on what we have now. Please.”

Graham knew from her shoulders suddenly falling as if the weight of the world was crushing her small but not so frail body that he had won. By the sight of this reaction, it was obvious that she was hit right in the feelings. It would make her think about being fine. Maybe had he been too hard on her. Her back was shaking and he suspected her to cry although she was still not looking at him.

“I lost a woman I’ve loved dearly years ago. I could never see her again and now that I can… she’s probably gone forever. I got used to her absence only to fall again…”

“This is about Yaz, innit?”

“Ryan has a thing for her.”

“Nothing but a strong friendship. She’s more interested by someone else.”

The Doctor felt her hearts stop beating for half a second before a dash of adrenaline rushed through them and threw them into an emotional stampede. Her hand gripped the edge of the console in an attempt to control herself. She was setting her hopes too high. Hope prevailed but was also dangerous. You couldn’t have too much of it.

“This is not my business.”

“I think it is, and I think that’s also the reason it affects you so much at the moment. This creature was mostly after you and it used Yaz against you.”

“I would have done the same for each one of you.”

“But it wouldn’t have affected you this much.”

“I’ve lost many of my friends before!” she screamed, finally facing him.

Her fist was clenched, so was her jaw. Her eyes were burning with rage. Once again, Graham had touched a sensitive point but she was refusing to admit it. She had to get it out of herself so she would feel better. She would hate him but he wouldn’t leave until she got it off her chest.

“More friends than you can imagine and they were all lost because of me! I’m not gonna let this happen again! I’m sick of losing people!”

“That’s why you don’t want to get attached.”

“But I fall in the trap every time.”

It was too much for her. She leant on the console, unable to wear her mask anymore. All her face was marked with her disillusionment: she couldn’t fool anyone. Who was she kidding with her king of okay, always being okay? She was picking her companions for their intelligence, compassion and reactivity. Of course they would decipher the emotions of a Time Lady. That’s just how clever they were.

“You really love her, don’t you?”

These words found deep down an echo from a past life. She was wearing a different face, was into a coma post regeneration but she remembered the words: _“You really love him, don’t you?”_ They were Mickey Smith’s realising the strength of Rose Tyler’s love for the Doctor. They never got to admit it to each other sadly. When she tried… Even when Rose came back… At least, a part of her had been living with her, though it hadn’t made it any easier for her back then.

And today, it was her turn to hear those words and to be forced to face the reality of feelings. She didn’t feel Graham’s gentle squeeze on her shoulder, nor did she hear him leave the TARDIS. She was left alone with her thoughts and her doubts. What could she do now? All her secrets feelings had been unveiled today. Everyone knew. And she still wasn’t brave enough to take a chance.

“Doctor? Graham said you wanted to speak with me.”

This had taken the Doctor by surprise since she was avoiding them all lately but it was about time. Yaz suspected that Graham had forced the Time Lady to speak about what was happening to her and the red face wet with tears of her friend convinced her of that fact. She walked closer.

“Doctor?”

The blonde woman didn’t even reply or look at her. Something was definitely wrong with her. Her dear Doctor would usually have looked up, smiled and said something funny. Yaz couldn’t help but cup the Doctor’s cheeks and gently made her look up. Her beautiful green eyes were full of tears and it broke her heart to see her friend so devastated. She had to change this sad face into a happier one.

“What has this good old Graham said to you? He can be so tactless sometimes.”

Yaz was playing the joke card and hoping it would bring the shadow of a smile on this beautiful round face. The Doctor noticed the effort; the corners of her lips twitched. Yaz gave her a soft smile and her hearts raced. So much gentleness and softness in her touch and she felt herself melt. She opened her mouth, closed it again. For once, she was speechless. No word was coming out of her mouth and Yaz found it quite funny from someone who never stopped talking.

“Cat got your tongue?”

This simple question made the Doctor react and instead of speaking to prove she still had a tongue, she awkwardly pressed her lips against her companion’s. Yaz didn’t push her away. On the contrary, she gripped the Doctor’s shirt to return this kiss. There were so many reasons for this kiss to be forbidden, many reasons for this relationship to never go anywhere but, at the moment, it didn’t matter at all…


	2. Wolf of humankind

“Get her inside!”

The desperate cry of the Doctor compelled Graham and Ryan to move faster while Yaz was opening the doors of the TARDIS to help them getting in faster. The boys were carrying the body of the Doctor’s dying friend – or girlfriend, their relationship was still unclear – back to the ship after they sustained a bitter defeat in attempting to stop a war between the Batalagas – small belligerent creatures – and the people of Rio; the planet, not the Earth town. They had all taken blows but Rose had stepped between two fighters and a clawed hand had gone straight through her chest causing damages beyond repairs. The Doctor had entered into such a state of rage and been so quick to neutralise the responsible and to free her from this deathly hold that none of the three companions understood anything.

Now they were back in the TARDIS. They dropped the body on the ground and stepped back when the Doctor knelt down beside the other blonde – they strangely looked similar, almost like sisters – and put her trembling hands over the hole in her chest. She had survived so far; she had survived for so long. She even crossed the void to come back to her. Bad Wolf was running in her veins and protecting her from everything like ageing and dying but such a wound… Could she survive such a wound?

Rose’s hand found the Time Lady’s cheek and gave her a smile that would have comforted her if her teeth weren’t stained with blood, sign that her body couldn’t handle such an injury and recover easily like it used to. She had to survive. She couldn’t leave just now. The Doctor wouldn’t be able to deal with _this_ loss. She would have been affected by any companion’s death but this one… She would never get over this one. She was still having nightmares about the void, about Bad Wolf Bay, and she knew that Rose was alive! How would she survive if she died?

“I wanted you safe, my Doctor.”

Those words pronounced in a last attempt of saying goodbye broke her hearts: Rose had said those words to her the day she embraced the power of the Time Vortex, a power meant to change her forever instead of killing her. This power had separated them to bring them back together for the better. Until now.

“Stay with me,” begged the Doctor.

Rose had one last smile for her beloved Doctor who was pleading her to keep fighting but it was too late: her hand slipped from the Time Lady’s face to fall on her wounded chest and her eyes were closing themselves slowly. She exhaled her last breath that was covered by the painful scream of the Doctor and the sad looks of their human friends.

x

“Doctor?”

It had been hours since Rose passed away and the Doctor hadn’t talked to any of them. When she couldn’t cry anymore, she silently dragged her body to their bedroom. She had undressed her, cleaned her upper body and face from the blood covering her and bandaged the wound. She had put a clean shirt on her and combed her hair. She was sat beside her and was running her fingers through her hair as if she was just sound asleep. Not a word, not a cry. Just them and the silence.

The TARDIS was being very worried about her beloved thief. It wasn’t the first time the Time Lady was dealing with grief but this particular death was different from the others. The TARDIS herself was having a hard time accepting the fact that her Wolf was gone but her priority was on the living. She had to take the Doctor away from Rose’s body. It was unhealthy for her to stay here. Plus, if they remained on the battlefield of a war, they would have more troubles than a simple death.

The ship nudged quietly the mind of the Time Lady to draw her attention, nudged a bit harder when she got no reaction and had to come to a conclusion: the Doctor was deliberately ignoring her in the midst of her pain. She had to find another way to help her and only the three humans gathered in the console room could do that now. She led them all to the Doctor’s bedroom hoping they would be able to help. Graham was the first one to take a chance.

“Doc?”

He put a hand on her shoulder, hand that was angrily shrugged off. The Doctor turned around swiftly and dug a blaming finger in his chest. Graham rarely saw her eyes so red, so puffy, so filled with rage and despair. She might be about to yell at him but it wasn’t her anger speaking: It was her pain. A pain he knew all too well. A pain she was gonna use against him to force him to leave.

“Don’t go around telling me you know how I feel! It’s not the same as you, it’s never gonna be the same as you!”

Graham was prepared for this reaction, had anticipated her anger. All Time Lady that she was, the Doctor was going through the different steps of mourning and was now dealing with anger. She wasn’t meaning her words; he wouldn’t let them reach him.

“I have lost and seen more than you ever will in your entire pathetic life and this woman,” she pointed her finger on Rose, “saved me from myself. She healed the worst wound you can imagine! She _saved_ me!”

“So did Grace for me.”

His reply was very calm. He was in total control of his emotions contrarily to the Doctor. Ryan and Yaz were standing behind him, ready to intervene if it was going wrong. They were heartbroken: Rose was their friend. As old as she had always been, she looked like a woman in her early thirties, just like the Doctor did. If Rose hadn’t been presented to them like a friend, they would have thought she was a sibling, almost a twin. Her character was making her lovable but her eyes were full of a wisdom and weariness only someone who had seen and handled too much could have.

“I would be dead without her.”

“So would I.”

For a couple seconds, the Doctor was left speechless: it was the truth, she couldn’t deny it. Graham had indeed been saved by Grace who gave him the will and strength to fight his cancer, to survive and live again. In a way, losing her for him was like her losing her Rose. Except he still had Ryan, the only family Grace had left, to live for. And she… she…

“You’re not alone, Doc. You’ve got us.”

Them. Three little humans meant to die too soon. Their lifespan was just the blink of an eye for her and she would have to go through the mourning steps again. She was so done with this. She could just go back on Gallifrey and finally gave way to their rules. If only she wasn’t convinced deep down that this life would kill her faster than a Dalek’s deathly shot. Her bottom lip quivered, she tried to speak but Graham stopped her with a simple ‘I know’ and wrapped her into a comforting, protecting and somehow fatherly embrace. Her two younger companions joined the hug that was interrupted when Ryan noticed something unusual about Rose, something he had noticed already the first night he met the Doctor.

“Doctor, you gotta see this. That’s… That’s what was happening to you when we met.”

The Doctor was so quick to move from the hug and to glance at Rose, even quicker to sit back down on the bed and cup the blonde’s cheek. Bad Wolf. The golden glow in her veins had to be the leftovers of the Time Vortex she had absorbed hundreds of years ago to save her Doctor. Such a long time ago… And yet, her DNA had been corrupted to increase her lifespan. Could it be that it was corrupted enough for her to regenerate?

“Oh, please, give me this miracle. Don’t take her away from me.”

The three companions didn’t leave the room. They stayed by the Doctor’s side, all gathered around the bed and observing the golden glow flowing in their friend’s veins, observing it as it fixed her heart and brain. The Doctor was begging for her pink and yellow girl to be brought back to her. The tension was so high in the room that a simple spark could make it explode. The wait was unbearable and never-ending, and the humans were scared that the Doctor might just snap and become crazy.

All of a sudden, Rose’s chest rose as she was taking a deep breath like the one you took in the morning when you woke up. The Doctor let out a loud sob when the blonde’s eyes fluttered open. She threw herself on Rose and gave her a full mouth kiss, her tears making it salty. This confirmed her companions’ suspicions about their real relationship. They turned their heads away out of respect but couldn’t help the smile when Rose’s hoarse voice asked a single question to the Doctor:

“Is this your way to ask me to marry you?”

The Doctor had a laugh so full of relief that the whole room was relieved from its tensed atmosphere. Rose propped herself up on one elbow and stroked the Doctor’s cheek to erase the tears flowing down here. She gave her a smile.

“You’ll have to do better than that if you want me to say yes,” she murmured in her ear before kissing her temple.

“I don’t think I can do better than you regenerating but still being my pink and yellow girl.”

“I bet you can.”

She could do better indeed, and she proved it on the next night. They were back on the beaches of Rio in more peaceful times, their friends had been given free time in the capital and the Doctor was wearing a casual but classy outfit: a thin black shirt with coloured stars pattern all over the fabric, burgundy pants and black leather boots. She had added a beautiful pink and yellow flower to her hair and was wearing the glasses Rose loved so much on her, glasses they usually kept for the bedroom because of the arousal it threw the now immortal in. Herself was wearing a pearl-dotted cream satin gown she had once worn when she was travelling with her first Doctor who needed to prove himself to be someone else than the rude Northerner in a battered leather jacket and jumper, and he showed her how lovely and cultured he could be by taking her to the opera. She would never forget that night.

Rose couldn’t help but whistle at the sight of her favourite Doctor standing beside a small table and pouring wine in two glasses. No sign of dinner but they weren’t here to eat. It was much more important than an ordinary dinner.

“At least, you made an effort to get dressed and you haven’t stolen anything from my wardrobe.”

“Don’t say that as if you hated my style.”

The Doctor turned around and her smile froze when she saw the dress. She hadn’t seen it in a very long time and hadn’t expected it to reappear so suddenly. Rose smiled shyly, ducked her blushing face in her shoulder. They didn’t need any word to understand each other, to share their love.

“Maybe I should have made a bigger effort.”

“You’re perfect to me, Doctor.”

The Time Lady walked to her girlfriend and kissed her like the world was ending around them and it was their last kiss. She only pulled back when Rose needed to breathe but didn’t let her have a break before she spoke again.

“Rose Tyler, I—”

“Yes.”

“I haven’t even finished my question!” protested the Doctor.

She pouted, sign that she was sulking, and it made her look like a school teenage girl. This image really had an effect on Rose. If the Doctor wasn’t so shy about doing the thing publicly, she would have taken her immediately. Instead, she just nibbled her bottom lip and smiled at the moan she was given in response.

I don’t have good memories of this bit of sentence.”

“I could never go to the end that day. Time was limited and I’ve wasted it.”

“Say it now.”

“I love you.

“The whole sentence.”

“Rose Tyler, I love you. Not even the TARDIS could represent the immensity of the love I have for you. I’ll be totally unable to keep on living without you. That’s why,” she put a knee down and took Rose’s hand in hers, “I’d like you to bound with me the human and the Time Lord way so we could never be apart ever again. I want you now and forever. Rose Tyler, would you like to marry me here and now?”

“Yes. Yes. A billion times yes.”

The Doctor grinned that grin that reminded her so much of her Doctor with blue eyes, but whatever the face, she would always love _her_ Doctor. The Time Lady got up and intertwined their fingers. Their hands had always fitted together, proof that they were meant to be joined and to never let go. Instead of passing an engagement ring to her finger, she led her further on the beach. They followed a trail of flower petals Rose hadn’t noticed earlier – the Doctor hadn’t gone into _cliché_ with roses – and jars containing fireflies lightening their path. At the end of this trail were waiting their friends. There was no other way to celebrate a marriage than to be with your closest friends, with your family.

Graham officiated thanks to some website giving you this particular right – something that didn’t exist back in 2005 when Rose met the Doctor – while Yaz and Ryan were the witnesses. The ceremony didn’t last long and finally the two soulmates were bonded by the most powerful vow that could exist in this universe…


	3. The woman who fell

Rose Tyler was done with her boyfriend’s bullshit. She might have been head over heels a couple months ago for this sweet so-called bad boy that was bragging about stealing in shops and running from the police multiple times. She had fallen for the seemingly unreachable guy smoking menthol cigarettes and drinking strong alcohol and sharing with everyone even if they weren’t legal. She had been seduced by his beautiful words and unlikely promises. All of this had led them straight to that miserable insalubrious flat: there was no heating, the wallpaper was torn and hanging low revealing the cracks in the concrete of the walls, hot water was a luxury and you were lucky if you could shower without ending up electrocuted.

James “Jimmy” Stone had promised her lots of things for the future but he was keeping none of his words. He was out most of the time – looking for a job he said but she doubted it was even that – and she was the idiot waiting for him and doing her best to make this place more pleasurable to live in. Lately, he was forgetting to come home and three days could pass by before he finally walked through the front door covered in bruises and smelling like the sewers. He would smile at her and drop his catchphrase – ‘honey, I’m home’ – before putting away the paper bags of groceries he had managed to get in the kitchen. He wasn’t violent with her. He was treating her rather well actually: he was affective, wasn’t cheating on her – she sure had checked that point with Mickey, her only friend left – and was making sure to give her all she needed but he was doing it illegally and she was uncomfortable with that idea.

Sixteen years of living day after day not knowing if you would make it to the end of the month had prepared her well enough to the situation she was in. Jimmy didn’t have so many risks. There was one single thing she didn’t know about his secret lonely activities: her boyfriend had fallen for a new band of criminals ruling their district. He was their new ‘dispatch rider’ and was given missions that were more and more dangerous and illegal. Rose of course had found out about it when the police knocked down their door and interviewed her about Jimmy’s illegal activities. It took them hours to realise that she didn’t know anything: he had kept her out of his immoral life and when she tried to talk to him about it, he simply pushed the subject away and declared that they weren’t in danger. Until one of his mates caught her in the streets and tried to rape her.

Rose came home. Enough was enough. She was done with his shit; she was leaving now. She packed the few belongings she had. She was gonna go back to her mother’s even if it meant admitting that she had been right all along about this guy. Going back wasn’t to please her. It wasn’t like she had any other choice. Her younger from a couple months self had been blinded by the admiration and love and dreams Jimmy was feeding her with and so she gave up on her studies, most of her friends and her mother was refusing to speak to her as long as she was dating him. Now that she was leaving him, she would welcome her back home, right? Rose hoped as she passed the wobbly heavy door of the building. It was night and she only had a backpack. It would make her run away easier. Hopefully she wouldn’t run into Jimmy or he would convince her to come back. He always knew how to manipulate her into staying with him.

That’s how she had gotten in such troubles in the first place. What would she do now without him? Without any certification? She could go back to school maybe. She would have to see. Her mom would help her. If she wasn’t rejecting her again for falling in love with an idiot purveyor of impossible dreams. But she knew what it was, right? Her father was an expert in making big projects he never realised in the end and he never gave up until the day he died. She knew the story by heart now, her mother had been telling it to her since she was a baby. She pushed the thoughts aside. She couldn’t have them distracting her at the moment.

She had to be careful. This district wasn’t safe in the daylight, it was worse in the night. She couldn’t know, Jimmy always made sure she wouldn’t have to go out at night – often locking her in the flat when he wasn’t there – or accompanying her whenever she had to. Today, she was alone but adrenaline was still rushing through her veins since the attack and it was chasing her fears away. Or she was just too stupid to be afraid. Her mother used to say that she was fearless and reckless. What if she was just too stupid to be scared? Whatever it was, she wasn’t prepared for what happened the exact moment she reached the Powell Estates where she would find her mother and be safe finally.

There was a loud noise like the crack of thunder breaking the air that made her jump. She was convinced Jimmy or one of his friends would come out of the shadows to bring her back to the flat and that feeling increased when the outside bins were all knocked over by a huge black form falling straight from the dark skies and crashing loudly among the rubbish. Rose was petrified. Her brain was screaming to her that she should run away right now but her heart was so noisy that her muscles couldn’t hear the order. She had to stay here and watch what would happen next. No one but her seemed to have heard the noise. There were dogs barking as usual but no one was hiding behind their curtains to catch a glimpse of what would be the next local gossip. She was the only witness and no one would ever believe her if she spoke about it.

A blonde-haired head suddenly emerged from the mess. The head belonged to a small woman wearing what looked like a raggedy suit way too large for her. It made her look really tiny as if she was a child wearing her daddy’s clothes. She was far from being a child though. The voice clearly was one of a grown-up woman. She was waving her arms at her and Rose didn’t know what she was supposed to do. She didn’t know that woman… Did she? A feeling deep down her core was whispering to her that she could give all her trust to that stranger, that they were meant to meet, that they _knew_ each other. And yet, Rose didn’t move.

The small woman ran toward her and Rose could only stare at her as she was getting closer: she was very small, barely taller than she was, blonde, pale skin, dark eyes – from what she could see in the night – distressed clothes that seemed to have survived an explosion and despite the fall, no sign of a singe scratch or fracture or sprain. It was as if she was casually coming out of her home. In rags.

“Are you a doctor?”

Doctor. The word inexplicably almost made Rose smile. The sound of it was pleasurable to her ears right now. It never was usually. She was always avoiding going there. But at the moment, the word had nothing to do with medicine.

“I… no.”

Rose pulled herself back together and stopped staring dumbly at the woman. It wasn’t polite. However, there was something irresistible about her that gave her the strong envy of grabbing her hand to run to new horizons.

“Oh. Do you know where I can find the doctor?”

Her upset face was so cute that Rose couldn’t help but smile. It confused the woman so much that she adorably frowned and her stupidly scrunched up face made her look even funnier. _She must be a patient of the closest mental hospital_ , thought Rose. She should be on alert; this woman could be dangerous. Her instincts were telling her that she _was_ dangerous but would never be for her.

“What kind of doctor are you looking for? Got any name?”

“Got it on the bit of my…” She stuck her tongue out and pressed a finger on it. “What’s this called?”

“A tongue?”

“Tongue! That’s it, you sure you’re not the doctor?”

“Sure,” laughed Rose.

“Doesn’t matter anymore.” She put a hand to her head. “Suddenly, I feel very tired.”

“You fell from the sky.”

“Oh that? Regenerated and caused a huge mess in my TARDIS. She hates that. Kicked me out. Oh, I’ve lost my TARDIS now.”

“We should get you checked out at A&E.”

“No, no, no. I never go anywhere that’s just initials. Although…” She stuck a finger up her nostril. “Ah. Can you catch me?”

“You’re going to fall over?”

“In two minutes, nineteen seconds. Wait. Forget the two minutes.” She groaned. “Oh, this new nose is so unreliable.”

Rose was tempted to laugh but she was caught out when the woman collapsed in her arms. This night was definitely full of surprises.

x

The Doctor woke up from her regeneration nap with the feeling that something was really wrong. The process wasn’t totally over, her previous self was still clinging to her spirit while her new personality was trying to settle down in her new body. Her eyes flew open and were attacked by shades of bright pink and red and her hearts tightened because she knew this room. She hoped it was all a dream, hoped that this mistake wouldn’t change the future. How was it possible? Had her fall been so violent that it made her go back in time? Was she hallucinating? Her brain was fine, her whole being was fine. Too fine.

“I don’t see you for weeks because of that guy and when you come home you bring a random tramp who’s probably escaped from the asylum. What’s wrong with you?”

It was without a doubt Jackie’s voice and the Doctor grimaced: she hadn’t heard it in ages and hadn’t missed it. Jackie Tyler was a good mother but she could literally become a monster to protect her daughter. This wasn’t supposed to happen; it was too early. Years too soon. She had to leave before any harm was done to their timelines. There was only one way out and she had to go through the living-room where the argument was quickly getting out of control. She had to be fast.

She moved out of bed, pushed aside every attempt of her broken hearts to compel her to breathe in Rose Tyler’s scent to never forget it. It was tempting, especially since she knew how it was gonna end for her friend. She resisted, put the blanket back on the bed and turned around. Rose was standing beside the open door of the room, observing her. She was too young to be the Rose she would meet later in Henricks basement and she wasn’t wearing the right face. It was all so wrong and her hearts were beating so hard and she felt numb and Rose was speaking and she couldn’t hear what her moving lips were saying.

“What?”

She was really dumb but it brought a smile to Rose’s lips. She shouldn’t be here, shouldn’t take her time to leave but Rose was here and it was a miracle, a gift or a curse depending on how she thought of it. She was losing it and Rose was laughing now. Such a beautiful teenager she was. She would become a woman just as beautiful. She needed to stop thinking like this. It was unhealthy, immoral. She was a two thousand years old alien and she was… she was just a baby she would fall in love with in a couple years.

“You still look confused.”

“That nap did me a world of good! Thanks for your help, I gotta go.”

Acting casually in front of this particular person was harder than facing her worst enemy and not showing her fear. It was the hardest thing she had had to do in her entire life and she was keeping a poker face. She put a hand on Rose’s shoulder, gave her a smile and rushed to the front door, ignoring Jackie’s furious glance. She smiled to herself when she saw the cats’ trap and quickly walked outside. She hurtled down the stairs. Where would she go? She had no TARDIS and she was stuck in a time that wasn’t the right one. She was gonna have to wait until one of her former self came around. Or maybe Jack was there. One of them would bring her back to the right time and she hoped it wouldn’t be Jack. She wasn’t in the mood for his sexual jokes.

“Ma’am, wait!”

It was _her_ voice but she didn’t turn around as she was no woman. She wasn’t speaking to her obviously. She kept calling and she kept walking until she felt a warm hand around her wrist that electrified her skin and threw her inner self into a pit of panic.

“Will we ever meet again?”

“Maybe. Who can tell?”

“I don’t have much faith in the future.”

“Now you don’t but you’ve got a bright future waiting for you.”

“How do you know?”

The Doctor tapped her new nose with her finger before replying: “Intuition.”

“I hope it’s a good one.”

Another smile. She let go of her wrist and it took the Doctor all she had in her to hold the mix of her past selves back from taking her hand again. She had missed these little touches. Just a couple years and they would meet properly.

“Henricks,” she declared.

Just a hint of her future. Now, she walked away, her heart somehow heavier and lighter all at once. Rose stood there, confused about that last word, about this woman she wanted to meet again, this woman she wanted to know more of. But she was already gone.

Three years later, Rose was ending her shift at Henricks and looking for Wilson to give him the money for the lottery when she was surrounded by plastic mannequins. This man came out of nowhere, took her hand and they both ran away from the danger. Doctor was his name and she remembered that night three years ago when she met a strange woman looking for a doctor. She was right, her future would be bright. She wondered where was the woman now. She had the feeling that wherever she was, she was also having the time of her life…


End file.
